What Happened to the Coffee? pt1

December 24, 2011 in A Joyful Place Called Home, Basics Matter, Life Lessons, Living Your Values, She's So There, Sweetie As Strategist with 5 Comments

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My very dear friend, Melinda Emerson (@SmallBizLady) called and said I’ve open tweeted you someone I want you to meet, I think you’ll find her to be fun and someone you’ll want to have coffee with, you’re both from Arkansas.  Well, as any true Arkansan would tell you, hoghood is thicker than water.  That would be like saying your long lost sister has been found, of COURSE I would want to be introduced.  We tweeted immediately. Twitter IS the new front porch, faster than even the party line of old! More tweets were shared and a call scheduled.  I’m thinking great Skype chat over cocoa or coffee. Little did I know that call would change my life.

Some things we are simply not prepared for. We do our daily grinds, we work on being the best we know how to be, we take our lumps and try to learn from then. Sometimes in an instant life changes. My family lost my nephew after a congenital heart condition ended his life at school one day.  Life changed.  I married Les and added two children to my life in a way I could have never predicted. A joyful change, but adding a five year old, eight year old, eleven year old and seventeen year old to one new marriage….life changed.  Once upon a time in Fayetteville Arkansas a silly Honda civic did not have a lights on indicator leaving me stranded and asking a perfect stranger to hold my precious tiny babe so I could get help (her car was air conditioned, the outside air was 101. This was before cell phones. There is a 15 year old story now that bears telling, but that’s for another day….

The coffee date was planned for a phone conversation, but I was unprepared to know what was being served would forever change me. That Arkansas girl was author Allyson Lewis, whom I had never heard of. (authors kinda come my way a couple of dozen at a time some weeks…) and she wanted me to read her book that would be launching December 27th.  Alrighty, but I thought we were going to have coffee. (sounded very fun, grown up even, and after all she’s from HOME…Arkansas)  The book came via email that evening, I am an avid reader. By morning I had been through it twice and was now in  operation evaluation mode. I.could.not.put.it.down. You see I’m into learning to learn, and as a strategist with an educator’s background, this book was talking about memory, learning, living your values, priorities and something called the M O R E life.  The woman had it going on, and now it was me who wanted to have coffee with her.  The conversations continued and it seemed that my friend had been completely on target. I would love this woman.  I don’t know about you, but at forty-seven there are very few things I jump head first into and that particularly qualifies where turning strangers into friends occurs.  By 24 hours after reading this book the conversations were more about rapid fire excitement on both sides of the line than leisurely coffee chat.

You see, the book has a workbook that is so very the way I think that within 3 days of beginning its free downloads at The7MinuteLIfe.com , which are predated and ready to use from Member tools even before I had a hard copy of the book, was so closely arranged to the way I think, that I was lost without it by day 5.  The more exciting thing was that my… shall we say…. analytically driven husband Les (@morefromles) evaluated the planner and loved it as well, though he said it lacked the notating the hunting dates and a place to have me mark off laundry. (he would mention that again…it’s an old story, a standard Sweetie truth, I think clean socks come from WalMart or JC Penney, the washer just seems to eat them)

The next 24 days were filled with little sleep, much joy, and a serious oversight of coffee being made at our home. I have become the Excited Evangelist for The 7 Minute Solution because I so know that it will change lives.  In a world that never stops 24/7 , a community that is hungry for a MORE life….that is:

  • MORE passion
  • MORE joy
  • MORE meaning
  • MORE rest
  • MORE laughter
  • MORE responsibility
  • MORE time on things we love
  • MORE organization
  • MORE travel
  • MORE financial adeptness

I knew that the three principles: prioritize, organize, and simplify would in a word work to allow individuals to get back to the business of supporting their lives. I loved the visual simplicity, the online support systems and I knew that this.would.be.powerful in the lives of many. My life took on a new purpose in a heartbeat…to get this book into hands of those who could be use it, and in my opinion, that’s every.single.person.

Caffeine slows me down. An original wild child, everything seems to be backwards in my wiring. Those who know me well know that I can talk 180 mpg when I am truly excited or have “caught the vision” of a strategy that will work for learners and those seeking to help learners learn.   I have endless energy most of the time, a trait I share with two older brothers. We simply run like energizer bunnies. Technology available 24/7 has increased our ability to get to information and to use it but there was definitely MORE needed yet I find great joy in taking time my calligraphy, hand creating dinners, spending time with activities I am passionate about….and yet  permission for me to do that full time would have not been even considered before this book….or the reasons why it mattered explored past “well I just love doing it”  I hadn’t given myself permission to live as a Creative full out “Game On” with the analytical/tactical skills as the backup support in my business…this book project has changed that…and in 24 days the world of Sweetie changed forever.  I gave myself permission to be who I am and it.is.breathtakingly different to bloom this thing called my life..

and Allyson Lewis…you better not simply plan to meet me for coffee, you best plan to sit down and share the whole pot girl, I’ve got about a zillion things to share about how thankful I am for you and this book.  My “why and how” have been identified and now its simply about doing it! See you at the launch! (National Launch, Tuesday the 27th of December and debuting on #SmallBizChat on January 4th!)

#TrueStory

#Les is exhausted (be thankful it is not you! :)

#I.am.thankful

#Just7

Have a Merry Christmas!

Sweetie

Follow @Allyson7Minutes on Twitter and the SevenMinutes, inc team at @The7Minutelife

Join their FB wall and tell them Sweetie sent you!  http://www.facebook.com/the7minutelife

Download the member tools here which will include the Daily Progress Report Planner template and many tools to share

Be prepared to have life as you know it change.

P.S. Allyson and the SevenMinutes, inc Team…..you have been the most welcome surprise of Christmas this year!

Different is doable…

December 23, 2011 in Basics Matter, Life Lessons, Making It Mine with 19 Comments

Have you ever entered the space where your picture of what life is supposed to be like is so far past where you can be at that moment that it seems impossible.  Maybe you’ve said too many yes’s maybe you’ve spent too much on Christmas.  Perhaps you just ignored making a choice until the choice was made by avoidance of choices. Maybe your intentions were for an amazing gathering but your organization made soup and sandwiches happen that time.

Not making a conscious choice is a choice too. God honors preparation, though its never been my experience that He actually lets you do YOUR plan….but never the less He honors the thought…. and then the show begins…it turns out we don’t have to be God in our lives…we just have to allow Him to be our lives to be filled with Him.

We sometimes picture the American family as one who gathers round the tree and sings carols. Of course the house is clean, of course the family is happy each moment.  Who would dream it any other way?  But teens have lives of their own, parents and friends face life issues that are often less than romantic. We so want to be who we are, but we simply paint the picture with such perfection that we cannot find our way through the mask of hiding.  What are you hiding from in your life? Is it personal appearance? The lack of connection in a marriage or with an extended family member?  Is it the best of the best of what you wish you could do but are afraid to do?

Different is doable…but you have to begin where you are.

The first step of any new space in my life has always been to define where it is that I am.  The last few years I have more or less been apprenticing new skills in media and instructional leadership development because I value the power of preparing speakers, teachers & speaking 1:1 thousands at a time via streaming internet and distance education.  As an educator, a teacher of teachers, it was thrilling to me when this technology arrived in Arkansas so many years ago. It was one of the most efficient ways to cultivate state-wide projects in education and to connect educators.  Twitter is now my preferred method, for in listening carefully I can find who is talking about the topics I am passionate about.  My friendships from the Twitter as my friend calls it, are real, have transitioned from virtual on Skype to 3D form at conferences at on trips.  It has allowed me to find my tribe, as Seth Godin would define it.  A group of people I get…”sawbu” as Lolly would say and they see me.  Breathtaking energy.

Right now, as I sit early on a Christmas eve’s eve, I am aware that life changed 23 days ago.  A time of preparation bore fruit and I recognized that every.single.goal we set for a project for a client came together when we realized the impossible was done but it was based in doing it differently in a doable way.  The traditional odds were against us, the clock was ticking, the joy of the experience gone. It was simply time to define the moment and to make the moment defined.  Different is doable.   You’ve seen me on Twitter most likely cheerleading a project I am so very excited about. Allyson’s Lewis, the author of The 7 Minute Solution.  The book has direct methodology to use tracking and goal setting to support your MORE life…more fun, more awareness, more inspiration, more faith, etc.  The seven areas of life are managed in a format that I truly “get” and it’s gotten into me.

In less than 3 days after reading the advanced copy of the book, my perspective shifted. Les and I are facing some serious changes in our world in his position and my own. It’s been a wildly successful year in a way that was unexpected.  I have had the privilege of seeing clients labors bear fruits and the tragedies of clients whom I believed in choose to find another path when success could have been theirs.

I work with entrepreneurs, start ups, speakers and authors, and one thing is common across the board. To engage in excellence, you have to begin where you are and make doable differences and work your way up.  It is disheartening to me when a speaker, author, or business self destructs and tears down those in their paths.  My nature is to educate, support, and empower people with anything I can do to engage them in success, but there is many things a strategist cannot do for a client. They cannot keep them from choosing a different path than one that leads to a healthy, balanced succees.

Different is doable, ask any successful athelete, underprivileged leader, broken and restored speaker, or someone coming back with a winning attitude.  It may not be easy, it may not be welcome, but different is doable. We most often sidetrack ourselves from success, its an old story: greed, hurt, pain, arrogance, or unkindness sets us on the sidelines…obedience, even when peppered with mistakes, God honors. After all, David was a man after God’s own heart. Abraham messed up too and spent time in silence while he figured it out. The Biblical stories all play the roles from a place of imperfection without Christ.

Heroes are every day people to me. They’ve managed to make a choice to be who they are. A.Choice. Over and over again they face the same life we do, but they do it with resolve to be who they intend to be.  Some of those heroes in my life are:

  1. Thom Whitby- Extraordinary Educator, who developed the PLN Professional Learning Network, a community of educators collaborating online. #PLN
  2. Allyson Lewis-Time & Lifestyle Strategist, who developed The 7 Minute LIfe System and authored books that directly support my style of productivity #just7 (they are giving away a NOOK to online purchases through B&N on December 27th…wheee!)
  3. Allan Branch- Who each month delights my heart though we are not close, because each time he writes, I learn,…regardless of the topic #lessconf LOVE his Less Accounting for my business!
  4. Jesse Lamb- An amazing mind and heart who simply excels, and showed me that the right pond makes all the difference and was brave enough to face the change of ponds from attorney to creative. My personal tech hero…and friend.
  5. Sarah L Cook- Author of Raising CEO Kids, so smart she squeaks if you take on organizational structure management….an amazing heart too #SWS Systems with Sarah!
  6. Rachael Anne Ridge- HomeSanctuary.com, author and far away friend who helps others take small steps to find sanctuary at home each day
  7. Melinda Emerson- Who dreamed it, did it, let me walk along side her and continues to grow in educating how to end Small Business failure…. amen! #SmallBizChat @SmallBizLady (I’m Lead Strategist on that team!)
  8. Miss Bobbie Smith- Who faced all odds, including starting over in her 30′s, put herself through college, has become a speaker, leader, and creative as she graduates college  this spring, an amazing force of fireball energy and brains. @TheMissBobbie
  9. Irene Bullock- a friend who not only lost her husband at a young age, but went on to raise her children and others in such a way that we are all amazed and blessed by her presence in our lives. She has given me the gift of hope and support throughout the journey to be who I am becoming
  10. The TCK Team- Who are simply the BEST at supporting and engaging the needs of special needs kids and their parents and professionals. Truly an amazing group @TheCoffeeKlatch  #TCK
  11. Heather Hetchler- Cafe Smom, who like myself, believes in a joyful place called home….even differently. Creating support structures and materials for mothers and stepmothers (S’moms) everywehre. ~Brilliant! @CafeSMom
  12. Wayne McEvilly- Who simply makes my world a happier place for what he shares with audiences of all ages in conversation, voice in writing and in performing. What a tremendous joy to know of his existence.
  13. Jason T Bedell- who loves his family and passion for technology in education in ways I have first hand experienced. His vision was simply to begin TeachMeet Nashville and it made a difference in my life.  #Thankyou @JasontBedell
  14. Kate T Lewis- The Civilized Minute author, whom I have yet to hug her neck in person, but who in less than a year has captured my heart and joy in a way I cannot explain through her writing, Skypes and joyful country spirit.  @KateTLewis.
  15. Sohan Singh  Who taught me how to laugh again. An amazing spirit who simply loves to learn and has given me perspective of why the right team matters, and how to fly without eyes even in the dark of the difficult there is light in laughter. @SohanWins
  16. Cybraryman1  A lifelong educator and one whom I trust and cheer on from any court he appears….an educator whose passion is to share amazing resources for educators andparents. @Cybraryman1 Jerry Blumengarten (and his wife quilts!)
  17. #LessChicks  The valiant technology ladies who are clucking Brilliance….I .love. these .women. #LessConfChicks  #LessConf
  18. Gail Hyatt Who grows me every.time. I read her blog or hug her neck on the way by in Nashville. Real. Responsible. Intentional. Fun. Excellence in motherhood and personhood….I.simply.value.her. @GailHyatt
  19. Kelby Carr who taught me a hole in one lesson at Type A Family Conf when she, in the middle of the wild, did what mattered, supported her family in a calm and amazing way as she led the amazing experience. Kelby is not someone I know well, but I sure intend to. @KelbyCarr
  20. Sarah Mae Blogs- Creator of Relevant Conference, a blog conference for Christian bloggers….again, never have met in person, but oh so cheering her on from here. She.is.doing.it.  Changing lives, educating hearts, and sharing the journey. @SarahMaeBlogs
  21. Allison Worthington who invited me into her home and heart (and has the most fab green toile loveseat) and who has taken up residence in mine even when we work and live in different worlds…I’m a full time fan and supporter of anyone who makes the world smile and aware in her smart sassy way. @AlliWorthington  #Blissdom
  22. Rick Dean, who inspires me with his win/win/win scenarios in business and in arts…@DeanofMusic…he’s one to watch and has the happiest Christmas this year ever….your friendship to Les and I rocks!
  23. David Bullock..who is a friend at many levels, always there in a storm. He literally talked me through the Alabama tornadoes when I was alone in the level 5 place with no one to tell me what was happening and no where to get to safety.  His presence is trustworthy in any storm and he shows me that storms simply help you define what’s important. @DavidBullock
  24. David Cooper` who has for over 38 years mentored entrepreneurs, authors, and speakers and has the gifts and abilities to help them fly on all planes of success. He has given to my life so many gifts of encouragement and empowerment through educating me at the level I can play. He is loved like non other because the truth is, he isn’t selling soft sales, he’s softly selling truths. @AskDavidCooper
  25. Thelma Wells @ThelmaW who is often known as MamaT….a wordsmith extraordinaire and one who has captured my heart for life. Her words feed my soul and her ever giving heart not only gives me the courage to do this, but her books are a continue read or listen to in my life…what a blessing she and Vikki are in my life.
  26. The Chatty Momma Tonia Sanders, who has given me the gift of joy in every situation we’ve worked together whether over lunch or in person. Family comes first &Tonia rawks! @TheChattyMomma (one of my favorite people of all time, a forever friend who has the gift of connecting with hearts of all ages)
  27. Lisa Leonard, again, from afar, but her inspiration for her business, her personal and professional growth are as beautiful as her spirit. AMAZING (just love cheering and praying Lisa on…if ever I could be a cheerleader and prayer warrior, this is one heart I invest with pompoms shaking high!)
  28. Karen Rabbitt who forever changed my world with a book. Trading Fathers. She identified that which I could not. Her wisdom and work on forgiveness is amazing @KarenRabbitt www.tradingfathers.com
  29. Lucy Ann Moll- @LucyAnnMoll, author, Christian counselor to hurting women and the women who lead them. Great friend, amazing spirit. Lucy is someone I truly am in awe of, her heart, her leadership and her transparency is beautiful.
  30. Peldi @Peldi  Who in one speech, forever changed my life at Less Conference and I will forever thank him for that moment. Entrepreneur extraordinaire, his speech at Less Conference in 2009 simply changed my world forever…his continued kindness to me a gift as he inspired our daughter to be who she is…what a joy to witness his words blooming in her life.

There are so many more people to list but the jest is, no one had perfect lives, they made different doable.  This moment in time is so poignant as I simply see that we can face anything if we begin where we are. Where are you? What is in your heart of hearts to do this moment of your life? What is step one?

Owning My Life…Life Moments

December 18, 2011 in She's So There with 0 Comments

  What works for you? What makes your life work.  Around my  home there has been a tremendous shift in a few moments this week.  Music has returned to our home, not just the go to practice on Wednesdays and sing on Sundays kind of song, but one that has included our whole family in the chorus.  I learned to learn again in one area of my life this week.  Engaged in a life long love affair with learning and sharing learning I was surprised to see that one lesson learned long ago has resurfaced as a need to know…

You have to know who you are not to become who you are.  You see I’ve been hiding out. Staying away, denying self and choosing to ignore what can be a problematic existence.  It’s a problem our children face, my brothers faced and one that I see my client’s schools and families face.  Deborah Mersino knows this place and it continues to get past adequate steps for solving despite it being of great importance.  Life as a person who embraces their imperfections as well as their gifts. Engaging excellence is something  I love, not to compete, but to achieve, reach and be who I am…I appreciate excellence.

As a young child I knew I created differently than most. My stories were more vivid, drawings were of great importance to me. Music a  form of therapy of the heart.. There are many brighter, millions smarter, and no matter what else is true, so many more who use the gifts of their existence to give to others. Each of us possess gifts and they are for others.  The most able child and the child with the most abilities to teach us to love despite the need. Joy is in the giving and when intelligence is stripped away, often the heart teaches us that we over think life. period.  The dreaded “assimilation” had taken over my world again. Too much pleasing. Too much hoping to be enough. Too much trying to deny the areas of life where I am truly able.  Many parts of life simply have to be achieved to survive and for high creatives who are also high analytics…well without proper support (life would be SO much easier with a staff) it’s alot to dream, create, and launch without supportive environments.  My roles often mean I work with five development teams as the hybrid strategist that speaks the speaks of marketing and technical, product development and people ILT.  Then there’s the country girl part of me that simply loves to paint a barn.

Engaging to develop sequenced strategy for start ups and speakers, I am often called to do the work when its crunch time. Teams often have ruffled feathers when someone is brought in to align scope and sequence once and for all and deal with branding issues.  As a wordsmith I help direct the aesthetic design as well as the voice pieces of branding. The short version is the personnel often think I am a threat, but the truth is  I’m simply there because there is something I can do.  My work involves launching magnificent concepts into realities and yes, there are a good many messy parts of brilliance. They aren’t all big deals, in fact some of the most important things I do involve one to one interaction like teaching a child to swallow at 17 after 16 years of never having been able to swallow and solving the issue of his failure to grasp a cup by himself. It was a moment I’ll savor forever, to see his joy in knowing he could get a sip by himself, trapped in a body that no longer works.  A mouth that cannot talk, legs that won’t walk.  Being able to do 1 thing for yourself matters.  Intelligence comes in many flavors, the least of which is “easy  to manage”…we are given these dreams, abilities, and hearts to use them.  I spent the last 9 years trying to live someone who wasn’t me.  I love home, I love family, I love creating splendor too, but I.am.not one to be quiet, reserve, or not thinking and acting to create.  You see it’s hard to be different, its like having on a Dr. Suess hat when everyone else was in matching clothes.  You think differently, you see things differently and then you add the joy of additional issues to your life like a visual impairment. Well, I can’t speak for anyone else, but after two failed marriages and continued inexperience at living my existence on a public forum twenty years ago.  I. hid. out.  I’m alot to take on a good day, the exuberance and joy is real and I simply love life and working hard.  I don’t know why it works, it just does, and I know how to repeat processes. I tend to work with monster big issues because they get monster big results when you creatively resolve them. It’s time to admit it and just own it if I am to be who I am.

This week reminded me that I am a Creative. The kind that lives life in green clouds and purple moons. The kind that likes Math and sees it as its own art.  It’s a different perspective than many wear, but my truth is that its mine.  Music makes me come alive, the right color giddy.  I love working problem solves and I just prefer a good mud puddle than the route around it.  The music of my life returned this week in a most unexpected way…and I remembered…I am enough as I am…despite the imperfections.

Are you ready to start this season from a different place? Change happens in an instant says my friend Allyson Lewis (@Allyson7Minutes) and her take on the MORE life is worth a read. (tell them I sent you at @The7MinuteLife or on Facebook:  www.facebook.com/the7minutelife.  The 7 Minute Life has been a book that has changed mine in 7 days….and I don’t say that lightly.  She has reminded me who I am, she has shown me as Gail Hyatt and so many others have that it is our own paths that we must find.  I’ve found my path and I’m making it mine!  I am ever thankful for the friends and teachers in my life. My mentors have been so patient as they encouraged this part of my life to bloom.  You see, an educator’s heart means you can never stop learning how to lead, teach, facilitate, and learn. It’s what I am, it’s what I am made to be…and the lessons to learn are endless.

So you have fair warning…she’s out of the box of trying to be enough, she’s gotten the lesson that pleasing others is pleasant, but being  of yourself and obedient to the gifts God gave you to share with others matters more.  Thank you to Lolly Daskal, Wayne McEvilly, Sarah L Cook, David Cooper, Randy Elrod, Jenn Fowler, Melinda Emerson,  Kevin Lyons, Karen Rabbitt, Kate T Lewis,  David Bullock and so many more who have patiently played a part in helping me realize it is what it is. You might want to pray for my dear husband who lives in a hot pink kitchen and eats off polka dot plates….real men do you know…and Les is indeed a man among men.  It’s not as though the world is on fire, dinner still is my priority with family, but I know that I know that I know that I’ll never pretend it’s okay not to be me again. December 1st changed that forever.

I know I am blessed this day, and every day and I just can’t wait to unwrap this for living.

“A gift is as a precious stone in the eyes of him that hath it: whithersoever it turneth, it prospereth.”
(Proverbs 17:8)

xoxo

Sweetie

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

A rural perspective…Why #RR Matters

December 13, 2011 in Basics Matter, Growing Into Lovely, Leading, Life Lessons, Living Your Values, Making It Mine, She's So There with 2 Comments

I am from the rural deep South and one of the things I value about my rural upbringing is that in my small hometown, people have life-long relationships. I am blessed by the presence of decades long friends…so when I say Reliable Resource #RR (Twitter hashtag) as a product, service, person, or event…I mean that I personally wouldn’t risk saying they are worthwhile out loud without serious first-hand knowledge.  You see where I’m from the newcomer in town may have lived there forty years in the same house…so you have to live with a poor choice for a long time if you recommend the wrong introduction or without regard to caution, recommend something or someone.  Integrity matters there with a capital “I.”   After all the nearest variety stores were one hundred miles away and even the local gas station’s 3-aisle store, our version of the superstore, was over eleven miles to town.  Some popular media companies have made what we’d say in the South – “The Dog and Pony Show” a multi-billion dollar industry and they are laughing all the way to the bank while many times, they are leading us to a poisoned water, as though we’re silly cows who will drink any koolaid offered. Have you tried to feed a cow something they recognize as not their flavor lately?  They don’t drink it when they are aware you’re feeding them stuff we usually shovel out of the barn.  In my neck of the woods the boots to the left are used daily to clean up after such things in a barn. As country folk, we learned to look where we put our foot or to move the hay covering before sitting.  Things are not always what they seem. The warmth may look cozy, but it may be steaming for an entirely different reason. Folks need to know where solid values are supported, we like to say the folks to folks conversations on the front porch will make or break you in business and it’s absolutely true.

Today’s front porch is real time media, and thinking folks like @MichaelHyatt @PWilson, @USAA, @LollyDaskal  @Allyson7Lewis, @LollyDaskal @Bill_Roddy, @Cybraryman1, @TomWhitby @Classroom2.0 @VistaPrint @SmallBizLady, @DeborahMersino @FSonnenberg @GailHyatt and so many many more are sharing important concepts and ideals. Others like @MackCollier, @KateTLewis and so many others share the skills they’ve learned in meaningful ways without expectation in the open forums except conversation.  They know learning to learn matters, and they share what they’ve learned.  They help bird-dog point us to things that need to be addressed as surely as my lab does, even if she has to bring the problem literally to my attention. I so value @AlliWorthington and her husband for that in their scoping what matters in legislation often.  I appreciate that. I bet you do too.  It helps to have leaders who identify important concepts, who empower us. Thank you. You don’t have to have a PR machine to speak what you know out into space, let’s use our voices to support integrity. Change is coming and “we need to be paying attention” as Mr. Bullock would say.  You don’t have to agree, we just have to agree that it matters to discuss the important choices we’re making for our resources in leadership. I am not into politics, I don’t want to debate who is who, but I do care greatly that quality people, products, and processes are rewarded with our business, attention, and support.

So if you hear me say someone is a Reliable Resource or tweet #RR, you can bet that I have personally experienced or vouch for my dealings with that person. It’s not a made for TV version for marketing either…Les and I have built our family and business on the premise that we want to cultivate projects that empower people.  I thank @JenniCatron for that reminder of my roots, her vision realized in CultivateHer. Jenni reminded me that cultivating ourselves means hard work, planting for a harvest in our own lives and our children’s. We are responsible to grow ourselves then each other in community.  It was a foundational launch of a great early morning meeting,  that reminded myself who I am and whose I am…a country girl from the rural South who believes in putting on her boots and working out the messy parts of brilliance. (by the way, I’m the mule pulling the plow, not the girl in the house watching the workers) Life is messy, but relationships in business, products, and services shouldn’t have to live there with intention.

<warning…Southern girl on her soapbox….lesson plan from the hard school of life>

Tune in! None of us has time, money, or life to waste, we only have one to live to the fullest of our intentions. If we all work on encouraging those who value integrity and start walking in integrity ourselves more consistently, we will support an environment for change.  People like @SarahLCook  and @RachelAnneRidge who have spent countless hours helping moms learn skills to support home. People like @LucyAnnMoll who minister to hurting, broken leaders of women…and the women they lead.  People like Thelma Wells @ThelmaW who gives me personally the courage to face anything I face through her excellent writing.   Folks like @TheCoffeeKlatch who help us find help. These folks matter. Supporting the protection of our youngsters hearts and heads, and engaging in excellence with even the smallest things that we do matters.

If we learn to give more than we receive, my guess is that like my rural neighbors, life will just be worth living.  Big is not always better, small is not always an advantage. Weak is often truly strong. Where integrity, hard work, clarity of purpose,  and pardon is asked for when mistakes are made, life can be engaging.   When we engage in a good dose of thoughtful  awareness of those around us, we can choose and support values that we’ll be glad to call our own. We’re not asking nor do we want ugly call outs, perfection, or painting difficult days to turn out swell, we’re simply asking for you to recognize #RR Reliable Resources when you know they have worked for you and let’s help make things happen for folks who work hard to do right things for right reasons. Produce exceptional products, or are have such rare gifts as artisans that one should recognize their value and quality.

My husband has served in many wars, he’s currently home for the first time for Christmas in many years. We.are.civilians.  He chooses to serve our Department of Defense. It matters.  There are places and people that need to be defended and there are reasons we need to stand our ground in the U.S. Despite the popular rhetoric, we still have an amazing country, and its time we took back our homes and our towns where values are concerned.  Our home has decided, we’re firmly committed. Basics matter, and it’s time we simply begin to do what we know to do to refocus where our homes and communities are going.

Will you join us?

 

The Ladder…

December 9, 2011 in Life Lessons, Living Your Values, Making It Mine, She's So There, Sweetie As Strategist with 4 Comments

We’ve all heard the adage, “If you can just get out of your own way, you’ll succeed,” and I am here to affirm to you, those words are living truth. Whether I work with an author, a small business owner, a speaker, an artist, or an athlete, the rules for success are often universal. Your regional dialect, financial background, experiential scars, and situation have much less to do with your current moment and future than one simple thing: your ability to learn.  The mistakes that roadblock progress toward individual goals  are identifiable and predictable. We succeed through awareness of engaging key behaviors and paths to success.  In my case, learning to accept that God is Sovereign and, despite all logic involved, if He wants something to succeed, the person, team, or business can do everything wrong and yet He makes it right.  If on the other hand, it is not in His plan, every metric and logical step can be executed and it can still fail.  We succeed by learning to learn. Sometimes the lessons have to repeated until the student is ready to accept the truth of the lesson’s importance.  We do not appreciate or give adequate attention to anything we do not value. We often have to experience the importance of something through failure of our own or through a very close instructional viewing to value its worth.  That’s why even if I could wave my ” Queen Mother Strategy Wand” over your royal head, as my clients like to tease me, many times it would do you more harm than good. If you were not ready for the next step…it would not help you for long. Success is ordered, often success is sequential. At times it is vertical learning experiences, but eventually infrastructure of success must be supported. Each success experience builds the next as your skills grow. Success can also kill you, if it happens before you’re prepared to deal with its own issues. Hollywood and young fame has often sadly shown us that.  Netflix, a brilliant product, sadly had to learn that lesson as well but with effort, they will overcome the reteach.

A rookie mistake often witnessed when I travel to work with small business owners, educators, or VIP clients is that too many of us believe that we have to recreate the wheel to experience success. The fact is, we have to learn what doesn’t work, not do every silly mistake ourselves. Our ability to study, prepare, and use different methods than we have experienced affects our ability to succeed.  Usually we visually or financially think “I need this or that”…as in a website, product, more time, opportunities, or a handout to have a chance at success.  Our beliefs are a funny thing, they create our realities.  Ouch. Many times the thing we needed was within our reach, but our ego,  or the latest marketing campaign led us to believe we could not do without something…or perhaps our own fear did. Very often that thing wasn’t even required to succeed at all.  The world seems to say “YOU are not enough” when God says “I will provide for your needs” its a tough concept (I can assure you God and I have had that conversation a few hundred thousand  times through the years when I didn’t heed His advice or truths).

When I wasn’t ready to learn what was being taught…

There is a story that tells the tale of a man on earth wanting to go to heaven without dying.  The fact was, a ladder was sent for him from heaven….but Jacob still had to climb the ladder to succeed in his goal. We silly humans often think that no such thing happens for people today. Again, I see in my daily life ladders from heaven sent through individuals in the form of opportunities that are missed, lost, or not even climbed because the person offered the ladder was too busy in their own mires of false beliefs to even perceive what was before them.

You see,

You don’t always have to cut down your own tree to climb or create a ladder

If you perceive the path of your personal success as impossible, your brain in its inner workings can create an impossible path.  If your perception is that to have a ladder you have to cut down a 125 foot tall 5 foot round tree, you may just convince yourself it is impossible. But that is only a misconception.  Trees are hard to cut down, whittlin’ a ladder, almost an inconceivably hard task from the perspective of chopping down  a 120 ft five-feet around oak before you….Sometimes to get to the next place, you don’t need to chop down the tree. But, if you do not know how to evaluate the problem, study those who get past the problem, or look for ways around the problem, you may miss that the problem doesn’t exist. In fact, you may end up cutting your own limbs off doing something you had no business doing to begin with (Can I hear an Amen?). If you are able to be taught, if you are teachable, you can get up, study your situation from all sides of the problem.  In that seeking the solutions set, you may just look around the perceived need, walk around the view that belief is blocking, and see that the truth is doable. You may have perceived that you had to cut down the tree to make the ladder, when in fact a ladder existed past the tree….you just needed to get past your own expectation of how hard it would be to see the ladder waiting to take you to the next place. You might even find that a helicopter would simply place you on the next realm of your goal through your diligence, someone believed in you enough to help. You simply had to stop believing the tree was the ladder. In that way, so many of us make mountains out of molehills and the very possible a much more difficult task…

and sometimes, often in fact, it was just a matter of saying you were ready to own a ladder and it will appear in the form of an opportunity….to learn….so the real question is…

Are you teachable? Are you willing to give up what you thought was the path to success?

 

 

Getting to Know Me….Creativity…

December 8, 2011 in Growing Into Lovely, Life Lessons, Making It Mine with 0 Comments

As a child the word “Creative” was my mother’s word spoken over me.  It was the kindest definition of what I was as an extremely high energy, engaged-with-enthusiasm child.  You see my mother was quite well done in identifying each of her children’s gifts and affirming them verbally.  There were other words mentioned too, but one would imagine if “creative” is your adjective, that would lead to the others. My mother’s favorite definition to frame the others in a polite way that sounded so much more loving than the experiences of it as a parent involved was to say “as a child she was simply “busy.” In the 1960s creative was perhaps a “dangerous” gifting for a parent to face about a child. It might mean (shuddering) she would want to be an artist, or never mold into a career, or be hired in corporate roles, or horror of horrors….find a man who would make her an Mrs. (after all this was the 1960s) that was the social goal of having a daughter: to marry her off well. Thankfully my parents didn’t subscribe to that theology, they believed education would be for just that…opportunities to learn.

The status quo was being questioned as we entered the world of television for the first decades, the Beatles arrival, and Ed Sullivan and Beaver’s mom defined what “right” households looked like though Vietnam and Nixon said the fairy tale wasn’t a happily-ever-after tale anymore.  It was a childhood of breakout behaviors, fashion, and social revolution.  Perhaps parents hoped more for definers such as  “steadfast,” “solid,” and “hard working” as the comments others identified their children on report cards, casual comments, and in bios. However, the word that repeats in.every.single.one of my six weeks, semester, and annual report cards, and the teacher’s comment remains to tell the tale.  Academic: E, though every paper could use less doodling, commentary, or illustrating. Please encourage her to focus on the problems, not populating the backs of pages with pictures.” Deportment: Extremely respectful despite her high creativity, if we could just get her to stay with us her deportment would be E for Excellent, not U for unacceptably unable to recognize the status quo of silence without permission to speak when she’s excited about what she perceived.  Remember, these were the days of children should be seen and not heard as they sat in perfect lines for the entire class.

Thankfully recess and outdoor time were still a part of every elementary child’s life in meaningful timelines. However I believe I spent the majority of mine learning how to sit still since I couldn’t do that in class (and by the way, still prefer not to). Perhaps that was a gift too, for those moments outside allowed me to embrace my imagination as Anne Shirley would, “In meaningful and delightful experiences completely created while being told to sit still and be quiet.” They were some of my most vivid journeys into imagination. I learned to notice and let what I saw take on a life of connecting of its own.  The steadfast, solid, and hard-working came with time and experiences, for we all learn what doesn’t work for us in our lives if we choose to have the courage to face each item.  When we embrace our lives with creativity, we can even choose to face with courage that we ARE able to choose what works for us and change the world with a life that is empowered by the best use of the components within us.

The truth is every child is creative.  We are born to create. The creator of the universe….well…. he/she/it created. It’s in our DNA.  As an adult I have come to cherish that my primary gifting is creativity which is within me and I have absolutely no responsibility in its initial presence.  At best, we can learn to accept, affirm, and choose to allow our gifts to be shared with others. It is my belief that that is their purpose in our lives.

As an adult who cannot imagine the world without seeing the world through the lens in which I was created, I am reminded that we too often allow ourselves to forget who we once were. Learners and artists who painted with learning and engaged with laughter each mistake and new experience with no fear involved.  Supervision of children is needed for that reason, for their glossary of experiences doesn’t include important resources of experience, but then again, they aren’t hindered by them either in their ability to engage.  We delighted in experiencing and assimilated through the creative try outs as infants what worked, what didn’t work, and what provided the pure joy of exploration.  Today’s video below delighted me. It helped me put into perspective why the things I do are important in my daily life.  Things like keeping a journal or notebook with me to jot, dash, and draw things as new perceptions occur to me, to bird dog later the “aha” moments of every day life experiences to ponder, draw, or explore later when it’s not an appropriate time.  Embracing my creativity is not a luxury, it is a necessity to be my best me.

Personally, I think having the perspective to connect concepts, ideas, formulas, and experiences into a new way or non traditionally thought of configurement is simply divine.  To allow the meaningful moments one experiences through the celebration of one’s creativity simply is essential to engaging excellence.  My medium is whatever God puts before me and like, Eric Liddell, of the movie Chariots of Fire, I can feel God’s pleasure when I use the gift He so kindly created within my being to empower others.

By the way, I think my Mom would have been pleased (and quite relieved) to know that I did not only learn how to harness the creative energy that she was so concerned would cost me in life, but its presence has allowed me to experience success (albeit in many times, non-traditional routes getting there) in many environments simply because I CAN creatively solve problems in ways others might not have perceived the problem or the solution set.  Who knew?  So hats off to you Mom, the truth indeed set me free…and you identified and spoke truth into my life and over my young spirit when you chose to embrace who I was as a person, even if with trepidation.

What words were spoken over you as a child?  How are creating and creativity important to you?  What do you do to cultivate creativity in your life? How do you use any or all of the above reminders in your daily life? What brings out your creativity?

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